Changing where someone is cared for at the end of life

There may come a time when the person you care for needs different care and support. They may move into a care home, hospital or hospice for more care. This could be because they want to, or because they need more care than can be given at home. This can be especially difficult if you’ve been caring for them at home. Here are some ideas on things you can do to support them through this change and where to get support for yourself.

On this page:

Talking through the options

Depending on the person's needs and wishes, you'll need to speak to them and their GP or district nurse to understand what options are practical.

It can be a difficult conversation to have, especially if you feel that they need more or different support. There may be times when the person doesn't want to talk about the future. While it's important to listen and respect their wishes, try speaking with their healthcare team for support.

Their healthcare team will try to support their wishes about where they want to be cared for. They'll have a conversation with you about their needs, including symptoms, pain and comfort. But it's not always possible to provide the care they need in the place that they would like.

It may help to prepare some questions before speaking with their healthcare team, such as:

• What will it cost?
• Who will arrange transport and moving?
• What will they need to take with them?
• How can you still be involved in their care?
• Are there any restrictions on visiting?
• What happens in emergencies?

Read more about choosing where to be cared for.

Check if they have plans in place

The person may have made plans for their future, including how they want to be cared for and who should manage their money. They might have:

• an advance care plan
• set up a Power of Attorney.

Check that the staff at the home, hospital or hospice have a copy of these and any other relevant documents. Make sure they also have up-to-date contact details for you and anyone else involved in their care.

Read more about planning care in advance.

Transport and arrangements

The person's healthcare team will usually make arrangements to move them into a home, hospital or hospice. They'll advise if they're too unwell to be moved and talk you through the options.

If they're moving to a hospice, their healthcare team will arrange this as soon as there's a vacant bed.

Coping with change

Looking after the person might be a big part of your life. You may have mixed feelings if your role in their care will change or end.

It's important to remember that you haven't failed if you can no longer help with their care. Even if they move into a home, hospital or hospice, you may still play a part in their care by visiting, keeping them company, and looking after their affairs.

It can help to speak with others who are in similar situations to you. Online forums and virtual chats can be a good way to connect with others. You could try:

• Carers UK online forum  
• Sue Ryder online community  
• Marie Curie Community
• The Mix group chat for young carers  
• Memory cafes and clubs run by Alzheimer's Society  

If you'll be spending a lot of time visiting them after they move, think about how you'll manage. You may need some support.

Read about how to cope when a friend or family member is dying away from home.

Need to talk?

Life is more challenging right now, but we're still here for you.

No matter your worries, our nurses, trained officers and volunteers are here to listen.

• Call our free Support Line on 0800 090 2309
• Chat to us on webchat
• Send us an email at support@mariecurie.org.uk 
• Speak with other people in similar situations on our online community

Our Support Line is open 8am – 6pm Monday to Friday and 11am – 5pm on Saturday.

External websites

Carers UK  

Sue Ryder